Is this the end ?

If its the end of everything .. What is the last thing you wish you could do ?

there are so many rumors that doomsday is coming and it falls on 21.12.12 ..
should I be worry by now ?? because its 11.00 pm 20.12.12 while I'm still blogging peacefully ..
haha .. doomsday might come one day but not today ... pretty sure about it ..
but who cares ... we're gonna live as long as we could .. as happy as we can .. as cheerful as life could be .. as painful as anything can be .. because you only life once YOLO !!!
so this thought came in my mind this evening while I was driving ..
if today is the day .. I have a few questions for myself ..

1) what is the last thing I wish to do ?
2) any regrets ?
3) who do I wanna be with till the last breathe of mine ?
4) anything to confess ?
5) any last words ?

If today is the last day of my life ..
the first thing to do is to tell my family and friends how much I love them .. how much I appreciate to have them in life .. I guess this is what everyone will do .. but its something should be done because after that you won't have the chances anymore ..
The last day is to hug every family of mine tight ..
if we are allowed to choose the next family in my next life in the new world..
I wish I will be with the same person as my dad my mom and my siblings ..

what else ?

when I first thought of writing this post ..
I start to think of things that I had regretted ... after a few minutes of wondering ..
there isn't much thing that I had regretted on ..
even though there are lots of pain in love life .. but yeah .. I didn't regret in loving them and having them as part of my life .. because I believe there isn't right neither wrong in love ..
Regret letting myself being lazy for six month since the last exam ? nope .. this is the best six months of holidays that I can get in my life ...
Regret of being who I am now ? being too strong ?? Nope .. I'm proud of who I am and no one can be proud of me as much as myself =D
Not much to regret .. and there isn't a reason for you to be regret of anything in life because everything that happen teaches you a lesson that no one else could teach you ..

then ...

Of course be with family lo .. because don't have someone special ma ..
this is kinda one stupid question ..

next ..

confession ?
hmm .. not much too ..
all was .. after so many years .. 3 years I guess .. I still have someone in heart .. even though in between I tried to fall for someone else .. when I thought I could .. the fate tells me I couldn't .. I'm still there .. all this while its still there and the fact is I'm not letting it go ...feelings were still there ..
is like I've been walking in circle ..  never have a starting point neither an ending point ..
somehow ... I miss those time being with Mr. Y ... first confession "Mr. Y , I still miss you." =)

while I thought I could start something new with Mr. T .. fate tell me no .. not him ... because he end up with someone else  .. even though everyone thought this is the start of a new relationship for me but its not .. I'm angry of Mr. T because he made me realize that my heart has no space for a new someone yet .. of course the complete story was too long to write but overall there were too many pressure and attention on us so it was to complicated to make it happen . .. I placed all the blame on him .. every one see him as the bad one ..
but second confession .. I'm not angry of Mr. T anymore because love couldn't blossom between us due to various of reason ..

in between this 4 years .. from foundation till now after completing degree .. there is always a someone in my life that never give up on me .. but feeling was unable to grow for him .. he is always a big brother or a good friend of mine .. he is been there in every ups and downs .. but wrong timing I guess ..
third confession .. Sorry Mr. K ... You have been the good friend of mine ... and I couldn't try with you because I cant afford to lose a brother ..

finally !!!!!!

last words ???
not much
I love you guys so so much ..
if we survive .. we will appreciate the chances we have and move on to be a better person !
so pray hard ..
and
BYE BYE if we didn't

Love ,
Lornalsq
=) <3